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This is serious but it’s a true life experience of a young man who is at crossroads over a lady he r.aped sometimes back that is now his fiancée. How will he go about telling her that he was the culprit that joined other friends to molest her some years back now that he is so much in love with her?

Here is his story: I got admission into a certain university in the country, being a jambite I was sharing a room with one of the final year students, the idea was to hand over the room to me when he would finally leave. We came from the same village.

On this fateful day I got back from the market, opened the door with my keys and got into the room only to behold my roommate/brother and his friends gang r.aping and degrading a girl, I was shocked and immediately I turned around to leave when one of his friends ordered me to freeze, drawing his g.u.n and I froze.

They forced me to take part in their vile deeds on g.u.n point, I could not resist them since I didn’t want to find out if the g.u.n was loaded. So I did what they wanted, meanwhile the beautiful girl who was blindfolded was crying and pleading for mercy throughout, at a point I couldn’t go on anymore because of her tears and cries and they pushed me away saying that since I was already part of the heinous crime I couldn’t report to the authorities anymore. Not that I was planning to report, who wanted his mutilated body found in a dumpster?

When they were done hours later they injected her with some sleep inducing drugs, carried her to their car because she fell asleep afterwards and drove off. I felt dirty and disgusted with myself long afterwards. I never set eyes on this girl after the incident, though I prayed not to see her because my filth and guilt about the whole thing would resurface.

Now many years later, I’m done with schooling and had pushed the whole r.ape incident out of my mind, though, once in a while it flashes it ugly face until I ran into this same girl at a super mart, our eyes locked for seconds and my beating heart was telling me that I had been made out until she smiled at me and said “hi”. I couldn’t respond because I was stunned and astounded at the beauty standing in front of me smiling whom I had been forced to r.ape 7 years back.

“Are you okay”? She asked me and I nodded not trusting myself to say anything. “But you look white and pale, you look like a ghost, are you sure you’re okay”? “Yes” I replied. “My name is Nike and I wanna get something for my younger brother for his birthday. Please would you help direct me in choosing something for him, he is 12 years old”?

That was how we struck up a relationship that has lasted for 8 months now in which she has told me everything that happened in her past including the r.ape incident and especially how the r.apists forced a fourth guy to take part otherwise he would be shot. These 8 months have been the most uncomfortable months for a guy to be with his girlfriend because that 7-year old guilt and filth has returned with full force. I had even once called off the whole relationship telling her that I was not worthy of her but she wouldn’t hear of it.

I could have done something differently that fateful day, I could have resisted them even if it meant getting shot, I shouldn’t have taken part in the r.ape of my fiancée, I should have fought them to save that young, beautiful girl. Now I’m getting married to someone I love so much but still can’t look her straight up in the eye.

What do I do please, should I tell her everything? Should I tell her that I was that fourth guy, should I tell her that she has all along been right when she says that my voice sounds familiar but she can’t just place it? Please what do I do?

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